I close my eyes. The gentle rocking of the boat lulls me into sweet serenity, rocking back and forth so calmly I can almost forget I am trying to get to God.
Difficult days push you forward, sometimes imperceptibly, and you find yourself just going through movements of routine. Get up, shower, dress, eat, chores, and so on throughout the day. Nothing causes you to stop and realize that the movements are rote.
And then, after perhaps days of wandering, you catch a glimpse of His robe in some part of your day. “Wait! Is that you Lord? Wait for me! Please?” My awareness of things of the Light is suddenly shocked into action. There is one thing to be grasped in this moment; my Lord is here and I do not want to miss Him.
I do miss Him, for days it seems. But I’m scrambling back up the banks of my awareness, trying desperately to get back to Him. The short Bible passages I am able to focus on in these moments serve as my lifeline.
Up the banks I go, sometimes clawing, sometimes resting, always knowing I must get back to the place where I can see His presence fully. He is a compelling force – and I want to be with Him. I can see the top of the ridge. I go for it.
As always, He is there. My wanderings have not caused Him concern for He always provides lessons in the chase. I see the river winding slowly away from me, around a curve, and then here it comes around the bend and makes its way back. My Lord has not left me – He is always there for me, waiting.
I jump into the waters, soothing balm for my tired body. The small boat is coming towards me; I grab its side and pull myself in. I am so weary, I cannot speak. I lay down and close my eyes.
The gentle rocking lulls me into sweet serenity as The River flows. I am with Him as we go forward together!